by ‘Angela’

Recently I received this account from a reader of the blog. It gives us an insight into the way that power can sometimes operate destructively in a parish. Here, a ministry exercised by an apparently competent woman priest has been undermined and possibly destroyed by the actions of a determined clique of parishioners who were against her. Many others have been damaged by the fall-out, including the writer herself. Our narrator does not offer us explanations which uncover the true motivations of those who were attacking the ministry of the Vicar. No doubt misogyny was playing its part, together with an unconscious patriarchy. Those who are reared on a diet of male superiority may find the role of women in authority hard to accept. We have, at the same time, to be open to the possibility that there may be a counter-narrative to this account. Some salient facts in the account do, however, suggest that the perspective of the writer is largely an accurate one. She speaks of two meetings, presumably organised by the diocese, to resolve the hostile activities of the ‘clique’ and find out the grounds for the complaints. If such meetings took place and there was no agreement of any kind hammered out by the disputing parties, then this diocese appears not to be employing adequately trained mediators. Mediation skills are essential in any organisation. When disputes of this kind are not able to be resolved, then the costs, human and financial, are likely to be massive. An ability to understand and resolve issues of institutional power is one of the central pleadings of this blog. We all have witnessed the massive ‘cost’ of the Winchester affair, in terms of destroyed morale and sheer financial losses, when mediation failed. Events which involve escalating dysfunctions of power in the Church seem to be increasingly common. The Church must find ways of stopping mini disasters like the one recounted below, from happening. Mediation and true reconciliation are not just words, but positive weapons in the struggle to re-establish truth and integrity in the Church. Without them the Church cannot have a bright future.
Angela’s Account
I have been a member of my parish for many, many years, a small rural church. After the retirement of the former Vicar, a young female priest was appointed to the post. She was very welcoming, warm and pleasant with everyone. This was her first position of sole charge, and she was anxious to do things correctly. We were aware that good support was our responsibility so that she could more easily settle into her ministry with us. Her sermons were outstanding, and this new Vicar brought a modern approach to the ministry during the difficult period of lockdown – zoom meetings, live streaming services and covid secure precautions for everyone.
Quite early on in her ministry, a senior male member of our PCC began to ignore emails and requests from the Vicar. This we could not understand. This hostility and unkindness became public when this PCC member berated the Vicar in front of everyone at the Annual Parish Meeting. The complaint had something to do with his position in the church. Many parishioners were naturally upset to witness this outburst. He was also accusing other church officers of always doing things ‘by the book’ in the way they carried out their church duties.
The new Vicar made many attempts at reconciliation with the PCC member, but these were not effective. Quite soon there followed a churchwarden announcing that he was stepping down from his duties for ‘personal reasons’. This churchwarden was conspicuously avoiding the services when the Vicar was present, only attending when she was taking services at the main benefice church.
The hostility towards the Vicar by this churchwarden extended to actions aiming to undermine her position. Then a small group of people started to complain about the Vicar’s sermons. These had always satisfied the majority of the members of the congregation. Complaints turned into tutting and shaking of heads during the service. The next stage was a refusal to go up for communion when the Vicar was present. This was not the case when a visitor took the service. Such actively negative behaviour was distressing to witness for the other members of the congregation. It could be described as a mobbing situation. It was as though this group were determined to demonise the Vicar and destroy her confidence.
It was very hard to establish exactly what was going on. She tried as far as possible to meet each complaint or challenge in a calm way. She was always apologising for any possible misunderstandings in the church and always trying to make sure everyone was included in all the decisions made by her and the Church Council. The small clique of parishioners who were undermining and unsettling the Vicar seemed to be threatened by the fact that she had authority in the church. It was not the fact that this authority was used aggressively or inappropriately. It was simply the fact that such spiritual authority existed in a church congregation.
The hostility towards the Vicar was then extended to anyone who showed appreciation or support for her. The bullying, undermining and isolating was turned on to them. After a few months the situation became so bad that the Vicar’s health started to suffer. She decided that her ministry had become untenable and made arrangements to move away to another church.
Many parishioners were extremely upset at losing this young enthusiastic joyous and kind Vicar.
Our diocese did intervene on two occasions by holding meetings to air the issues and seek some kind of resolution to the problems. Both were unsuccessful in stopping the bullying and preventing the continuing negative narratives aimed at the Vicar. Those PCC members who supported the Vicar began to leave the church. They could not tolerate witnessing the abusive behaviour being exhibited towards the Vicar. Overall church attendance also dropped off at this time. People were aware there was ill feeling within the PCC and elsewhere.
I did manage to discuss the whole situation with our parish safeguarding officer. She did take it up and report to her link person in the Diocese, the DSO. He acted immediately on receiving the report and passed it on up the Diocese. Unfortunately no one in the diocesan safeguarding team saw fit to take the report seriously, so no action resulted on the part of the authorities to help the situation.
The PCC members who had supported the Vicar’s ministry asked for a meeting with a representative from the diocese. This individual told us that he was sorry about the Vicar leaving in response to the bullying. He claimed that there was nothing that could be done about it, but it was suggested by them that relationships needed to be addressed prior to a new Vicar being appointed.
Our young Vicar left our church with a bad atmosphere caused by the clique.
I have witnessed the following: Bullying, mobbing, obfuscation of the truth, intimidation, abuse of power and control, sexism and duplicitous actions.
l am saddened, disappointed and angry at how slowly the Church of England approached and dealt with this situation. Thus, very quickly it escalated into a very damaging situation for our church.
I have since left the church due to the impact on my mental health.
I lost my Vicar, my church and my health.
Those who were responsible for the unacceptable behaviour stayed in the church and they seemed to act with complete impunity.
It is an experience l do not ever want to repeat.







